Dear Universe

Dear Autumn:

I love you dearly. You are my favorite, hands down. I love your fiery colors, your crisp mornings, your football games, and your back-to-school excitement. So why, dear seasonal friend, do you allow yourself to be pushed around by the bullies of summer and winter? Yesterday we were sweating bullets and wearing shorts and t-shirts in 90 degree weather. I couldn't sleep last night because it felt like a July night. Today, my kids broke out the big honkin' winter boots and danced around amidst huge snowflakes that were sticking to the grass. Tonight I'm wrapped up in my blanket with ice-cold toes, in denial that I need to go dig out my slippers. Stick up for yourself Autumn! We deserve crisp mornings and 70 degree days!


Dear Max:

I'll make a deal with you. If you promise not to bite me while nursing, I promise not to wean you. I appreciate that you're teething, but I would appreciate it even more if you didn't teeth on my nipple. I haven't had to use this much Lansinoh since you were a newborn. So next time you feel the need to chomp, please let me know so I can run far, far away.


Dear AFLAC-

Thank you so much for pulling your collective heads out and granting our appeal. It was definitely the most pleasant surprise I could have asked for today, and helped you avoid the lawsuit I've been threatening since you first denied our claim in May.


Dear Glee-

I am so glad you were on my TV tonight. I think I am officially addicted. Can you please be on TV on Monday night and Tuesday night too?


Dear Ice Cream and Hot Fudge Sauce:

Get in my belly. Enough said.