~The worth of an object becomes directly proportioned to your willingness to actually bend down and pick it up off the floor.
~You have a favorite color/flavor of Tums.
~Your nightly going to bed ritual includes clearing a path to the bathroom that you'll be visiting at least 47 times that night.
~You've been known to jump out of your seat or yelp occasionally because of a particularly hard kick to the ribs.
~Peeing in a cup at your Doctor or Midwife's appointment feels like an Olympic sporting event.
~You can stand in front of a very full pantry or refrigerator and then burst into tears because you can't find anything good to eat.
~After your husband makes fun of you for crying about it, you yell "Don't laugh at me!" sounding very much like a three year old.
~You then blame the whole episode on hormones.
~Your hips make more snapping and popping noises than a bowl of Rice Krispies.
~You threaten to shoot up a local fast food restaurant (that shall remain nameless) when they screw up your order and all you've been craving all day is a crisp bean burrito. Why is that so hard people? Come on!
~You can fall asleep standing up in the late afternoon, but wake up five hundred times later that night to pee.
~You make a nice, healthy meal that looks and smells great...until it's actually sitting on a plate in front of you.
~You could immediately tell a perfect stranger your EDD, LMP, and exactly how far along you are, (27 weeks and 2 days thankyouverymuch...) but you might very well forget your own childrens' names.